As I’ve hinted on the blog (or more like stated over and
over again, that you’re probably getting sick of it. Soz bout it), the past
year I’ve gone from lost girl with no clue what she wanted, who she is or how
to live, running around London hundreds of miles away from her family for no
reason other than escapism to sassy female who isn’t afraid.
Now I know my sh*t. And now I AM the sh*t, god girls and
guys, it doesn’t half feel good to feel confident in yourself.
So here are a few things which helped me feel more secure,
confident and powerful. I hope they help you too!
 1.    Knowledge
is Power

 So this sounds a bit like I’m trying to entice you into
becoming a ruler of the Galaxy and get you to embrace the force within,
but honestly you never stop learning. You can finish high school thinking you
know all there is to know from passing some exams, but every day you have the
potential to educate yourself more. Being uneducated in the modern world when
you have the opportunity (which you very likely will being able to read this)
is kind of like pretending to be poor when you’ve got £100,000 in the bank. It
doesn’t add up. So really, you should take the time out of your life to read
more, watch some documentaries and think. Really think about stuff, and not just
what someone said in the break room or the latest gossip rag story. That’s
fluff that won’t get you forward. Really invest in yourself.
And when I say get educated, I’m not saying go study Austen
or the Old Masters at length before bringing it up in the pub on a Friday
night. No, I’m meaning learn more about human rights (that’s LGBTQIA+, women’s
etc) and the things we as a team can improve on. Become more aware of sexuality
and gender, racism around the world and how some things you say can be harmful.
This isn’t me attacking you, it’s me sparing you being attacked. There’s no
reason not to want to be a better human every day. Spread a little love huh? Oh
and if you do want to chat Old Masters and Austen, go for it.  Just make sure it isn’t when the footie is
2.    Feminism

2015 was a big year for progress, and feminism was front and
centre. Brands were jumping on the girl power and feminism train like it was a
trend, and to a point it was. But knowing your worth as a girl is super
important and wont go out of style like pink eyeshadow or skinny jeans. It’s
here to stay, because it’s part of you as a human being, you are as
worthy as a guy and you can do a lot of cool sh*t girls. Realising this,
getting it ingrained into your mindset is super important to becoming more
confident and powerful. In moments of doubt, like ‘I can’t do this’ or ‘I’m
pathetic because’ try working backwards to why you’re thinking it. I can
guarantee once you start thinking about it deeply, you’ll be able to shake
yourself out of the negative mind-set and move forward positively.
by Sophia Amoruso
“A #GIRLBOSS is someone who is in charge of her own life. She gets what
she wants because she works for it.”
#GIRLBOSS is a book I cannot recommend enough to anyone feeling
hopeless over their future job prospects; it’s straight to the point, blunt and
ballsy. Sophia doesn’t fuck around – she’ll point out the things you haven’t
paid attention to and call you out on your bullshit. This book gets you off
your ass and working. I was glued to it the day I picked it up, missing out on
meals and the sun setting because I couldn’t.stop.reading. With self help
books, it can be too soft, too positive, too fake but #GIRLBOSS makes you
realise you can do anything. You can change your life one day and never look
back; all it takes is getting up and DOING it. Sophia’s story of setting up Nasty
Gal is admirable and really connects you to your own passion, as unlikely as they could be.
   Want to feel
powerful, capable and well… like a boss? #GIRLBOSS is for you. Don’t be scared.
Just pick up and read. “You’re going to take over the world, and change it in
the process. You’re a badass.” 
Because there is nothing more satisfying as a girl than being told you’re a
total badass, able to make up your own rules and throw the punches.
  4.    Big Magic
by Elizabeth Gilbert

Big Magic made its rounds on social media, with almost every
blogger gracing their Instagram feeds with this colourful book. And it was for good reason.
 For those who might not know, Elizabeth Gilbert is the woman
behind EAT PRAY LOVE. Yeah, that movie with Julia Roberts in it eating gelato
and ‘finding herself’. *Fun Fact* it’s the movie I watch when I’m feeling
particularly worthless slash being plagued with wonderlust.
  Anyways digressing.
Big Magic is the book every creative soul needs, especially if you’re in a rut.
We human beans overthink and overcomplicate things like CRAZY. You one of them?
Yeah? Grab Big Magic and thank me later. Never has a book calmed me, pointed
out the obvious we all overlook and get me thinking positively about
writing/creating stuff I really want to create but for some reason fail to
follow through. It’s a good kick up the ass we all need from time to time.
The way I see it, we’re in a maze and can’t see the exit because everything
looks the same. Big Magic is the person overlooking the maze with a clear view
of which corners to turn the right way. It’s the direction you need when
you’re lost. Don’t think you overthink and overcomplicate? No? Ok you’re in denial, go grab Big Magic and
have your world turned upside down. Or is it turned the right way round for
once? Who knows.
5.    Short
Hair Fun

For a girl, getting your hair cut is dreaded. We’ve watched
so many Disney movies that the idea of short hair makes us think we’re further
away from being a beloved princess, and more towards a troll doll. But last
March I turned 19 and decided the whole short hair thing wasn’t something I had
to save for a truly terrible breakup, took the dive and lost 6 inches of hair.
I cannot recommend enough you do the stuff you want to do
with your hair suddenly, randomly and happily. Was I scared shitless? Errr yeh.
But the moment my hairdresser told me to stop being baby and look in the
mirror was WOW. I felt like I was looking at the real deal me for once, not the
crappy high school people pleaser. Going short is what I identify as my
first step towards really loving myself. Saving short hair for the bad breakup
reinvention? PU-LEASE. We don’t need boys being crappy to rock the Posh Spice
bob. We just need confidence. THIS piece explains it in words I can’t even
describe. READ girls! And give my girl +Katie Oldham a follow, a thumbs up and a gin for creating one of the many beautifully written pieces I’ve read during this journey. 
6.    Exercise

I know, I know all you read on this positive posts is
healthy diets and exercise blah blah blah but seriously, I’ve never felt better
than I do when I’ve finished a run. 
After I went through first year uni, I had Freashmen Fifteen’ed like a
motherfucker. There was no escaping it, heck I was eating packets of biscuits
as meals, can you imagine? All that sugar and no working out? Ugh I don’t know
how I did it; I can’t even eat biscuits or anything really sugary now. Not even
cocktails, they’ve got to be sour and bitter than sugary and sweet.
  I worked out during
summer for something to do, mainly doing spinning classes, which make you feel
invincible as hell. Seriously, you feel like you can’t make it half way through
the class but once it’s finished you’ll want to fight in boxing matches and
race Usain Bolt. They’re incredible. Once I started second year uni I picked up
running again after two years barely putting one foot in front of the other, unless it was to the fridge or the TV remote. I couldn’t sleep after finishing
late shifts at the bar I work, so I just started running late at night as a way
to get rid of pent up energy and help me sleep. Then when I would miss out
running a week or so, even three days, I felt really anxious so running became
a fixture for me. Now I run every two days and it’s the best thing ever. I feel
more alive, more productive and stronger than ever. In July 2015 in ELLE UK,
Ellie Goulding spoke of how much she loved working out – “as a woman, keeping my
body healthy and strong is really empowering. My legs could be slimmer, but I
love them because they are strong
   Reading that just
struck with me, because after all the crap we go through in our lives, don’t we
want to be stronger? More powerful? I mean you’re reading this now because you
want to be, so why not up your workouts to beast mode and really challenge
yourself? Become a #GIRLBOSS, grit your teeth and get on with it. No mucking
around, really get into working out and be proud of yourself. And that’s not
even touching on the aesthetics of working out regularly. That speaks for
7.   Company

I know this is a long post and be now, you kinda want me to
hurry up and finish. But this last point is super
important. Without good company, you will feel lonely and sad. There’s no
two ways about it; everyone needs the help of other human beings to become
better humans. We need people to challenge us, support us, talk back, argue,
agree, discuss, cry, laugh and dance with. With good company of other
like-minded women you’ll feel more confident in yourself and supported.
  Support your local girl gang, compliment your fellow women, help out
your girlfriends and give a hand to the stranger on the train. One of the most
amazing things we have, you and me, is the power of being a woman. We
understand women, we know how to help and the bond we have with each other is
indescribable.  We are our first team and
we can’t go all Troy Bolton on each other. We’ve got to bring each other up,
more powerful than ever.

 This isn’t to say my life is perfect and everything is warm sunshine mornings and stress free Mondays. God no; but I’m better than I have ever been in my whole messy, emotional life. These things are just what I’m putting towards you as strongly advised suggestions. I think they helped and they’re worth a whirl.
Thank you for reading this far. All the love,

Lou x

Want to send an email? Contact
Twitter; @LouiseRamsay_
Instagram; @LouRamsayX
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  1. Nicole Marie says:

    I LOVED this post! I think it's important to be an independent and confident women!!! I really want to get #GirlBoss I went in to WHsmiths the other day to get it but they didn't have it! I need to get hold of if by the sounds of it!!! Thank you so much for doing a post like this! I have wanted to cover similar issues on my blog but not sure how I should go about it x

    • louramsay says:

      Ahhhh Thank you Nicole Marie!! I love your response, it's made my morning!
      I cannot recommend #GIRLBOSS more, it's so kick ass! So do keep trying to find it x
      Thank you again!! And feel free to send me a DM on twitter and we can talk about it, I feel I'd love this discussion 🙂 x

  2. Pingback: 19 THINGS I’VE LEARNT IN 19 YEARS – Predicaments of Lou

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